I wanted to start todays blog by asking you a question:
What do you believe in?
I know – this is likely the most vague question you have ever been asked.
The other day I was browsing twitter and I came across this picture and anecdote.
Now, I’m almost certain this is probably not true, however, it did got me thinking. Do you believe that things like this can really happen? Do you believe it signs, angels, miracles? I’m not completely sure what I believe in – I don’t think I believe in God, however, I do believe in something. This likely stems from the few extraordinary experiences my family and I have had.
The first and most incredible one happened to my parents. When I was very sick, and waiting for a heart in Newcastle, it was touch and go whether I would make it through each day. My new heart could take weeks or months to come, or it could never come at all. Returning from the hospital one evening, my parents noticed two white feathers outside the door of the room they were staying in. My family aren’t religious or particularly spiritual – but something about this didn’t seem right. The hospital accommodation they were staying in was on the second floor of a large building. Of course, staying in such hospital accommodation, it was very unlikely that there were any goose feathered pillows lying around. Where did the feathers come from? My Mum was slightly shaken – at the time, they were clinging on to anything that could offer some hope. However, it was likely that there was a simple explanation for their discovery – or was there? Thinking little of it, they went down to dinner. At about 8:00 o’clock they received a phone call. It was the hospital. They were told to travel to the hospital as quickly as they could. My heart had come.
They say that white feathers are a sign of angels and that they drop them to Earth to let us know when they are around. Was this my guardian angel sending a sign to my parents that all would be OKAY in then end? Or was it just a crazy coincidence masked by the desperation of a difficult and hopeless time?
One of the nurses that cared for me in Newcastle, before and after my transplant, became very close to my family and I during my stay in hospital. Travelling home from a long and tough day at work in the children’s intensive care unit, she too had a special experience. It was late and very cold and whilst in her car, a single white feather floated down and landed on her windscreen. Jane*, my nurse, believes in angels and was struck by this. Of course, the next morning she was quick to tell us about it and says she will always believe that the feather was sent from my guardian angel. Was it? Or was it just another coincidence?
I’ve had experiences too – but not always of the same sort. Maybe you have had similar. Have you ever had a gut feeling? An instinct so strong that you have changed your mind at the last minute and dropped out of something to later find out that had you gone, you may have been in danger? Or have you decided to go somewhere on a whim and its turned out to be a life-changing experience? Nothing so dramatic has ever happened to me but often my heart, or my soul, or my gut will tell me something – something that may mean nothing but deep down I feel is important. Sometimes these feelings really do force me to change my mind – often I’ll go to events that I hadn’t planned on attending and gain an awesome opportunity as a result. Often I have had bad feelings, that something odd was going to happen and then have later found out there has been a disaster somewhere in the world.
Before I was diagnosed with my tumours, I was certain there was something wrong. Ignoring all other symptoms, I had a instinctive feeling that things were going to turn bad. I felt my headaches weren’t simply migraine and that something sinister lay beneath them. There was no reason for this – my family and doctors had told me it was likely to be nothing serious. Unfortunately, I turned out to be right.
I truly don’t know what these experiences mean – or whether they’re just amazing coincidences. But I like to believe that there is something, or possibly even someone out there guiding me. Guiding us.
Please tell me your experiences with the unknown. I’d love to hear them. I have so much more to say about this topic, and I hope to maybe do another post about it one day.
I really hope you enjoyed reading.
*Name has been changed for confidentiality.